i’m being more careful next time.

from the strawberry-dark chocolates that i think i had too much, to slacking off studying latin and drinking bland tea from a tea bag that has been brewed far too often (if that is even the right word for it) everything became so clear.

he was someone i like. i like him in a special way and that in itself is a strong gesture for me. i didn’t give it a lot of thought until my friend told me that i better text him regardless. and in the middle of texting him, i realized that if he stood me up then, i would understand. liking him was like floating. i liked him, but at the same time didn’t know much about him. a friend told me that i might just like the image i have of him and that’s probably true however pathetic that sounds.

if he insisted that i shouldn’t like him… if he thought of it that way… then why can’t he just act like a jerk? why does he act like a jerk but then sometimes do things that i can’t help but like?

i think it’s me. i should be more careful next time–of the person who i will spend thinking most about and making me dysfunctional.

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