self centered

have i told you that my mom and my dad have a rather large age gap b~?

five years.

and no, i’m not referring to the age-doesn’t-matter-in-love topic, i just feel like because of that, my mom tend to rely on my dad a lot. being more dependent than she could afford to. even she herself admitted it.

today’s a rough Saturday. at least for me. the lazy disease hit me big this time, and i just… don’t.want.to.do.anything. but i had to. so i did and my brain feels–very heavy right now. when mom asked me to help her do the visa application process, i said to her that i don’t want to (you know how i hate filling in applications.) and she just… got mad. and of course, the whole ‘ungrateful child’ offense resurfaced again, like how it’s going to be for the rest of my life.

so i know i’m wrong. i cannot blame her for the things that i have to do, nor could i ever blame her that i have a lot of things on my plate. but i hope that she could at least understand a little. i am so damn tired and now that i think of it, it’s so hard to not be self centered when you’re tired. you tend to think about yourself… so it’s cold outside, i’m tired, i just want to sleep, but i had to do a lot of work, and now mom’s mad at me.

le sigh. the story of my life. i feel like crying right now.

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4 thoughts on “self centered

      1. 😀 optimism is a must dearest!! because sometimes optimism is the only thing that could make you go forward and not look backwards… it’s the food to endurance. it’s a shame not all people realize that. i refuse to be the bitter pessimistic person that i once used to be :/
        have a good day love… ❤

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