hey sweetums. so, i just got home from a spelling bee competition, and i didn’t win again.
xD i make it sound like it’s not a big deal, and it isn’t now. but it was last year, and the last year and the year before it. i joined the spelling bee for 5 years straight and i NEVER… and i repeat, NEVER win. such a sad sad story to tell.. but it’s true. i always go to the final round, but it’s either i win 2nd place, or not win anything at all. 😥
anyways… i just realized that i’ve mispronounced ‘vehemence’ all this time. i was doomed with that word, but if only Ms. Herpreet have pronounced it the way i’ve pronounced it all these years, i could actually go through. oh well, it doesn’t matter && the reason why it didn’t matter was because i wasn’t nervous AT ALL < surpringly -_- i’m ALWAYS nervous. fyi, i’ve always been this small, trembling, little squiggle of a nerveball at the corner of the stage– stage fright has always been my enemy since forever. probably the reason why i wasn’t histerically denying that i’m devastated over not winning the spelling bee was because i know i can spell all the words given in my round. i can actually spell all the onomatopoeia, recalcitrant, recapitulate & thespian and i’m not lying, nor am i overconfident (it might sound like that. but wtv) but i can. and it’s such a relieve to know that i’m not incompetent for the competition when i’m just ‘unlucky’.
the only thing i regret is probably that next year is my last chance to win this thing. i’ve been in the spelling bee since i was in Grade 5. can you believe that? they don’t have the competition on 2006, but i’m graduating next year, and i never won. i would love to feel the victory that i (hopefully will) finally achieve at my last year in high school. but if i don’t win it again… do they have spelling bee competitions in universities? i’d have to find out…
the next thing i regret is not eating. i made a list of what i was going to eat before i went out of the house since i know the bazaar would be like a food haven, but i suddenly didn’t have the appetite to eat. darn it! so i only had this bubble drink and a rather expensive cheesecake and i’m atm munching on a bar of soyjoy before going to the church even though i’m still not hungry.
for now, i will have to sign off. i will be back very very soon though… let’s just hope for a speedy internet connection tonight 😉 toodles~