read if you have nothing to do.

you know what? i just realized that i love the way my French professor laughs. it makes me happy for some odd and weird reason. apparently she told me that she once lived in Indonesia (about 15 years ago mind you) and lived in Bandung. she even told me about an Indonesian restaurant here in Montreal and i’m so excited to go there! i’ll drag Joelle with me. >:D

honestly, i can’t blog about anything much (which explains the slow post progress lately) nothing interesting happened. lots of work, lots of readings… a latin quiz tomorrow (but i have a latin quiz / test every Friday, so always mentioning it is kind of a moot point.) the weather’s fine today, unlike the rainy cold (bitter) Tuesday two days ago, so i’m enjoying the good weather you know how it is with me… i have never been much of an interesting person anyway, so when i’m buried with work, i get even more boring. i wish i can tell you something more interesting like, going to an exhibition somewhere, or, go to a museum — which reminds me that i’m actually going to a museum this Saturday with Joelle i will blog about that.

but yeah~ apart from that, nothing much happens.

i made a lot of friends here, but i suppose i’m always sticking to my smaller group of friends, so i’m not that popular (as always). yeah! there simply is nothing to talk about. i’m so sorry if you had to waste your precious ten minutes to read my post, but that is it. i’ll talk to you when i have more interesting stuff to tell you about.

p.s. when i have a boyfriend someday, i want to have a little picnic date at Lower Field. just saying. 

caput !

how about that blog? how about that… five (full grown) (now six) posts straight and i finished the challenge despite limping through to the finish line.

so i’m not happy about completing the challenge this way… but, i can’t help it i’m really sorry. i had a lot to do… got to finish my last minute packing and whatnot. oh, and speaking of packing, the reason why i’m rushing all of these posts is because i’ll be leaving. leaving the country. tomorrow. for college.

and somehow it still feels like i still have a long time here. /tear

what to do? my three month holiday is about to end and i’m hanging on, grappling for the last of summer. and i will will will miss my sisters :’| regardless of the fact that i hate them sooo much sometimes, or the fact that i know they intentionally try to annoy me, they are my sisters, and i love those precious little people so much i couldn’t help it!

so a little scared? yes ( i hope i get a nice roomie), excited? not at all. it really is ridiculous how unexcited i am. i have always wanted to go abroad somewhere, especially for university, so it really comes as a shock to me that even a day before i allegedly go, slash leave the country, i can’t find a single ounce of excitement in my blood.

what i know for sure is that it’ll be cold. how cold? i don’t know. the fact that i cannot even imagine going there, let alone, being in a new place, one simply CANNOT expect me to be able to imagine how cold it would be. (and you readers know how i am with the cold. i just… can’t. )

my only hope is that everything would start and continue to be nice and steady, and that i would transition smoothly to my new environment. you know, make new friends and everything…. just hoping that i will not turn out to be a party pooper. lol. bottomline: survival. i want to survive. i need to. i know no one but myself there.

so this is it. my last post in Indonesia before i go to …… somewhere.

i swear i’ll blog about it once i get there and have my own laptop, kay? i will finally make that late late late university post, but for now, it’s coming soon.

i’ll see you guys there. the same me, just… a different zip code.

love you loads,

me.

day 11: take a picture of your favorite school binder ~ #30dayblogphotochallenge

i’m not really sure what a binder is actually… a lot of people refer ‘a binder’ to several different things that resembles a book with those thingamajigs that can be opened and closed. so today i’m just going to write about the binder that i actually do have.

it’s rather small… a notebook sized binder. and it is filled with my science notes. it’s not really my favorite binder so to speak, but it is the only binder i have, and being a science student, i cannot afford to lose this binder. ever. it contains all my notes on leptons and quarks and esters and carboxylic acids and electromagnetic spectrum. a disaster will ensue if i lose this binder.

but that being said, the binder actually grew on me. it is obviously the first thing that i reach for when i dug in my school bag, but it also contain some of my doodles and weird scribbles about ideas that came so abruptly on a particularly boring science class. it is the home to all of my notes and revisions and summary… and it is old, so it’s already cracked at the edges.

but this binder has served me well… and i’m eternally grateful for it. without this binder, i may never graduate high school.

au revoir SBR

today is officially the last day that i will ever attend an SBR event as a student. i have attended the End of Year Performance for sixteen years. sixteen memorable years. from all of these performances, i’ve once been a butterfly, a tree, a belly dancer, a talk show host, and many other things that i can’t remember now.

it has been quite a journey, studying at Sekolah Bogor Raya. although i have to admit that there are a lot of things that i may disagree with in regards to the curriculum, the teachers, the methods of teaching–things that, up until this day, i can’t comprehend why they did those things the way they did it… but Sekolah Bogor Raya is a place that, if it doesn’t exist, then i wouldn’t too.

i know that the world is dynamic, and as such, everything is bound to change. but somehow, having spent my entire life in this school, it entitles me to at least say that i wish the school will maintain its excellent performance in instilling values to children. just how Sekolah Bogor Raya has been a home to me, i hope that it can also serve as a home to many other children who are still trying to discover their identity and also their second family–that Sekolah Bogor Raya can further be a place where a child can return to everytime, even when he doesn’t belong elsewhere. it is true that a school in itself is a business, but it will never be able to function properly if constantly viewed in a business perspective. not just anyone can be a founder of a school, and not just anyone can manage it. a good school can only maintain its quality if it maintains its essence, and it can only maintain its essence if someone has the heart to put aside personal qualms and emphasize on value. because in the end, a child will not remember how expensive their tuition is, what alliteration and assonance really mean, or even what their 7th grade science is all about.

what i remember most as a little girl is going into Uncle Doug’s office and reading Joe and the Farm Goose, and Wishing Moon, and Toot Learns to Fly. i remember that my teddy, Wooby, once stayed the night in his office and i remember the little fish desk decoration that can move on its own because of the little ticking wheel it was attached to. it is in that school that i made my first mistakes, and learn how to make it right. it is also there that i had my first crush and also my first heartbreak. it doesn’t matter now that i know leptons and quarks exist. it doesn’t matter that algebraic equations always result in parabolic diagrams… what matters is that i have a librarian as a friend, and the fact that she’s always there for me and my constantly hungry stomach. what matters is that i now know how it felt like to be bullied, do the wrong things, and having to suffer for it, but also at the same time, having learnt from all the things that have passed. what would be most depressing is to find this school, five years from now, being a great big building with thousands of students… and nothing else. just that. an empty shell of a school that once was.

the truth is, i didn’t get a Glee high school experience. i hated how my friends and i had to catch up with all of the jumbled up curriculums we were thrown into, and to be perfectly honest, having only two boys out of a class of fourteen students is rather depressing. but in turn, i met future successful lawyers, anthropologists, doctors, diplomats, writers, designers… made the most wonderful friendships and was taught by the people who inspire me greatly. it has been a pleasure to study in Sekolah Bogor Raya. i would never regret the day my parents found Sekolah Bogor Raya on a newspaper ad. it truly was a day that decided a major course of my life.

x

earning money

Here I am, with my lap top and my coffee stained paper on my lap. In the car. Waiting for my mom to finish her morning routine and drive us to school.

Blogging while listening to The Script’s Dead Man Walking on repeat. A song that so very painfully reminds me of him. Not our song. Just my song… A constant reminder of him who will never be mine. Received a shocking news yesterday that this year’s trip will be to Phuket, Thailand, and what flashed through my mind was a smile. Nothing significant. Just a smile.

Will need the extra cash. If mom’s not willing to pay for my trip, I shall pay for my last camping trip with my friends myself.

Someone once told me to never be afraid to lose money for the greatest good and that is what I’m going to do.
It’s time to enter some kick-ass competition, win, and earn money. Wish me luck

we still have hope

hey blog…. i’m now going to write about possibly one of the silliest things i’m ever going to blog. but i really need to say this simply because this is the fact, and i AM strongly feeling the situation.

have i told you that my class is a very very small class? it is. might just be one of the smallest that i have ever experienced. we have 14 students total in one grade. and when divided to the science and social streams, 9 students in the science stream and 5 students in the social stream. with only two, and i repeat, TWO boys. in the entire class. only 1/7 of our class population is of the opposite sex to me and that affects me greatly.

so when my friend, Nina, who moved to Seattle got a boyfriend in less than a month that she’s been there, i couldn’t believe it. i just couldn’t believe it. 

i mean, three of my friends are dating, and i’m actually accustomed to my friends having a relationship, but somehow, i just cannot process the fact that this sisterhood actually got a chance in attracting boys. (see how ridiculous i see it?)

despite going to a co-ed school, i literally, literally feel like attending an all girls school. i’ve been in that school for freakin’ 15 years. which is basically, my entire life. and the situation in class is like that of a girl’s dormitory, you know? what is that word again? oh… a convent. i feel like i’m living in a convent my whole life. it’s like the St. Trinian’s… a milder, less wild, geekier version of St. Trinian’s. we talked about things that we shouldn’t talk about when being near boys, but we did anyway… and i know they must be weirded out at first, but strangely enough, it is now considered something normal. and the boys that are in my class, i have known them for 14-15 years now. we grew up together and i knew both of them even before my own blood-related sisters were born. so they’re practically ‘its’ to me now. a platonic relationship that couldn’t possibly go further.

so you see? having planted in my head the idea that high school is so great with all the parties and boys and all that jazz, and not living it… it’s very contrasting, and contradicting. i have had previous boyfriends before, but not actually someone really serious. or not that i realize it now. i was devastated when the relationship ended but that is a whole other different story that i don’t wish to delve in ever again.

hence, knowing that one of our sisters (lol…. we sound like nuns) had successfully attracted the opposite sex, we held hands and hoped that one day, we could also meet someone who would love us and have a feeling of deep care for us. something that we, as we are now graduating in less than 9 months, have rarely experienced.

i love my girlfriends… they are everything to me. and i believe that each one of them, with their individual charming characteristics, will have a happy and successful life.

after all, we still have hope ;)

toodles… xoxo

ditching school and getting back to work.

hey babes… i ditched school today…

that being said, i wasn’t proud of it (as i know i’ll have a LOT of catching up to do) but, i won’t lie that it IS sort of refreshing. come to think of it, going to Jakarta at the middle of the weekday… awesomeness.

i… had fun. even though i ditched for educational purposes, i still had fun. the education fair started at 2 PM, but since my sister wanted a round with the counselors (which is confidential information mind you… she resort on not telling either mom or me) and so after that we went to Grand Indonesia to eat at Yoshinoya (a Japanese beef bowl restaurant that i have been dying to visit for so long) and cross to Plaza Senayan to eat in Bakerzin. and then we went to the Kartika Plaza hotel where the education fair was held and again, i had a cup of cappuccino and a slice of chocolate ganache cake. got a whole lot of information at the workshop prior to the fair, and met a lot of cute guys on the fair as well as collected the brochures that i have been pining for… so it was all good. perfect, even.

and now, what’s left to do is to work myself out, clean up, and dun dun dunnn!!! study. again. because at the end of the day, going to the education fair was all for THE reason. which is to go abroad. of which i couldn’t possibly be able to do without acing my SATs and my ACTs and my TOEFL. so that’s that.

let’s get back to work.

half headaches

do you know what’s the most fearsome thing about going to the dentist?

it’s precisely that time when he’s checking your teeth, making sure that you don’t have any dental cavities.

i hate dental cavities. i don’t dislike them, i’m not annoyed by them… i hate them.

having had to endure that pain of knowing if i have ‘new’ dental cavities or not (thankfully not… i’ve been a gurgling junkie ever since my dentist said it helps preserve the teeth), and also having tonnes of work from school as well as my personal responsibilities, i cannot help but get a headache. a half headache at that. only the right side of my head hurts–which makes it odd, and even more disturbing.

what’s more is that i couldn’t exactly abandon my studies. i know this all seem like a daily thing to you readers.. me complaining about my boring routine… but this is how i am, blog. i can’t help it. maybe when i graduate from high school, i’ll be able to study what i want and be less boring. i’ll have my ears pierced, a tattoo, dye my hair, and paint my room. i’ll be writing books like a maniac and making money so that i can buy my mother all the bags that she’s ever wanted… maybe i’ll be that kind of girl. maybe.

but for now, i’m utterly exhausted. extremely extremely exhausted.

scholarship!

such a tiring day :/ and i wonder why i get so tired easily when what i did today was attend my friend, Edrick’s farewell lunch, went to a mandarin class and did college research with mom.

i didn’t actually mention this to you earlier just because i know that even though you, my blog, is entirely my own… people can never be exempted to reading posts from you (not that i’m complaining dear readers i love you!!)

anyways, i entered a scholarship competition just a while ago. the contest comes in two steps. a 3000-5000 essay writing competition and when you are selected to further progress to the next stage, you’ll be interviewed by the judges. my essay was chosen and i did the interview… and guess what? i won it. i won the freakin’ scholarship. i won a one year full tuition program at Kaplan’s Business School in Sydney.

first reaction: … — second reaction: “wow”

i didn’t know that i would get the scholarship. but now that i got it, i’m not sure whether or not i should accept it.

i’m aiming for linguistics. i have to make sure that even though i attend their college for the first year, i would still be able to enroll for that major. but i’m so incredibly happy i sorta froze when i know i got it

and dad’s coming home tomorrow ^^ in addition to that, i have a two-week holiday looming over me. what is there not to be happy about?!

i’m happy happy happy!!!!!!!

Thank God for everything.

seventeen

hey blog… do you know what day it is today?

it is the third day of school… and yes, it is the day where everything gets a little more serious.

it basically is a normal Wednesday, despite the fact that it’s the 27th of July and that i turn 17 today.

honestly…. it didn’t feel like it’s anything important. i’m 17… so what? if it weren’t for my friends, my family, and people (strangers) on facebook wishing me a happy birthday, it would just be like any other day. they are what makes my birthday worthwhile. and i’m so happy now blog. i am. i am sooo happy.

my friends were like silent throughout the day. they didn’t actually wish me a happy birthday or anything… and ofc having been in that class for practically my whole life, i know that they’re onto something. but i just stayed silent. and when it was time to go home, they sang ‘happy birthday’ for me. despite having a strong inkling that they would do something, i’m still surprised and flattered. thank you soul sisters and my two very handsome soul brothers haha. you guys are the awesome-st. people are under the impression that i stayed in that school just out of loyalty… know that if it weren’t for you guys, i would’ve been long gone. i’m extremely blessed. you guys are the epic-est, most awesome friends that i will ever have.

but sadly, there are no pictures. haha… i’m holding a birthday party this Saturday. i guess we’ll just have to get those pictures from there.

p.s. we finished the tree. i mean, decorating the tree in our classroom. i’m so going to take pictures tomorrow and post them on here when we’re thoroughly done